Coffee Dates & the Need for Heat.

The cold season is (has been) here with us… It is actually ending. This is the season that sees a lazy drizzle that can last up to midday or even the end of the day in Kirinyaga. The season ends with a bang by the occurrence of a killer 8 day drizzle that goes on and on for most part of the day with temperatures going so low you would wish to be jobless at the time. The entire cold season has been there for quite a while though. We were having drinks at the spot where most mount Kenya region chaps gather for a drink or two before boarding their matatus to the country side on Accra Road – Tea Room as it’s commonly known. Since It was approaching evening, it had started getting cold. I could not notice it though, since I was still sweaty and heated up from the long walk from Statehouse road to Downtown Nairobi.
Out of know where, my friend from the countryside said. “It has been so cold of late!” my pal and I (City People) said, “True that!”
Nairobians, “Especially Kerugoya!, we really suffered the other day!”
Here we were referring to the day before, which we had traveled to Kerugoya.
“Yeah, that is true!” Weee!!!!
“But this cold, is also good. It has made me receive calls that I would never receive on an ordinary day!”
My friend and I looked puzzled. We were already laughing. You would if you heard the tone that the guy used in a clean Kirinyaga Kikuyu accent. I call it ‘Kirinyaga accent’ because it is a blend of all the dialects in the county. Then as fast as the laughter came, it died. Reason being he needed to explain what he had just said.
“The cold temperatures!!!”
So, in a calm and collected voice, he explained…
“You know in this cold season, women are the people who are suffering the most!”
My mind was already on overdrive and it missed the point the first time – If you know what I mean.
“Women are the people who suffer the most, because of three things. One, is they are very clean and they hate mud. The mud is a bother they would do anything to avoid!” “Secondly, they feel so cold that they need someone to keep buying them tea. This is how random coffee and tea dates.” “Then on the last but very rare one, courtesy of the mud and the bothersome roads, they need someone who can be good enough to take them from point A to B.”
While he was speaking, I did a quick flashback to my years while working under the Surveyor. Whose office was the next stop I made after landing in Kerugoya. I tried to remember if I ever took anyone on a tea date. A Season oriented date. I did not get any conclusive answer. I am bad enough at these food and drink oriented meet ups. Back then actually I was too naïve to handle such. My dates involved watching Prison Break back then. I will not go there. My countryside person went ahead to say that if you wanted to score a woman from the Mountain Region… This was the season to do so. Then we were like ahaaaa… So that is how it is? It was even more hilarious when he said that once the sunny season is back, you will be forgotten & lost in the phonebook like a makeshift grave, until if you are lucky enough to remain relevant on the phone book, you will get a call the next cold season.
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